If I ever needed a brain transplant, Id choose a sportswriter because Id want a brain that had never been used. Larry Nance Jr. Jersey .- Norm Van Brocklin When I was 13, I transferred to a new school for the first time. I had spent ten years from junior kindergarten through Grade 8 at the northwest corner of Bathurst Street and Viewmount Avenue in midtown Toronto. It was my home court advantage. I knew the roll of the rims and the carom of the walls and which teachers were lax at taking attendance. It couldnt last forever. At some point a promotion was coming, and my record setting minor league career wouldnt matter once new maths and makeup-laden girls challenged all that I had honed. I was heading to St. Andrews Junior High. Grade 9. The Show. Embarking on my first day in the wilds of the public school system, I knew I had to make my mark early. Mr. Pelech, my clever English teacher, noticed my t-shirt just minutes into the first class. It was a tattered, ink-drenched Grateful Dead concert tee. He remarked that "Grateful Dead" was an example of a contradiction. Contra what now? Coach tapped my shoulder and I hopped the boards. I proceeded to argue with a shellshocked Mr. Pelech for several minutes. My arguments were lithe, varied and completely illogical, but I had been trained to stand my ground no matter how ridiculous my position. Eventually, a hapless Mr. Pelech scanned the class and sputtered, "Just who is this guy?" Each one of my classmates shook their heads sheepishly as if to say uh, dont look at me. Mark made. Within two weeks I owned that school. They didnt realize the repressed explosiveness that ten years of private school Yiddish lessons would unleash. It is in this brazen spirit I introduce myself to you now, Dear Reader, as your new weekly columnist for Bardown. Why was I chosen as The One to guide you through the international sports landscape, particularly with so many scribes vying for your sports-saturated eyeballs? Commence the elucidation (AKA bring da noize): Basketball. This is my wheelhouse. I know all the lyrics to Kurtis Blows Basketball and I have for decades. I own a Sweet Georgia Brown-humming Harlem Globetrotters pinball machine from 1979. I still play pickup every week at a local high school against stiff competition in their very extremely late twenties. Also, I was an associate producer for the Toronto Towers of the NBA for nearly 500 games, post-games, pre-games and exactly five playoff games. Ooh, another thing, I call the Toronto Raptors the Toronto Towers because I have some self-respect. Baseball. I spent five teenage summers selling peanuts outside the Dome under the alias Mike Simmons. Despite a promising career as a sidearm Eephus pitch-throwing specialist, the leagues advanced scouts were never able to unravel the mysteries of my potential, because apparently throwing over the plate was a "prerequisite for success". Racists. I submit that using the All Star Game to decide home field advantage in the World Series is akin to the winner of the submission portion of Americas Funniest Home Videos determining the nominees for The Oscars Best Picture award. Also, you can thank me for getting the old Blue Jays logo back, as days after writing this piece, the marketing director for the Jays was following me on Twitter, and months later a new logo was born. Also, my therapist says I have something called a narcissistic personality disorder. Football. In 1998, I moved to Los Angeles to pursue the dream of being rich and famous which is why you know me so well today. That same year I became a fan of an upstart outfit known as the Baltimore Ravens because I thought Ray Lewis was almost definitely innocent of murder and I am obsessed with Edgar Allan Poe. Fifteen glorious seasons later I have two championship rings (made of foil and buttons) as my testament. I have correctly predicted, in pre-season, the Super Bowl participants for 13 consecutive years and I defy you to prove otherwise. (Note: Please dont reference my Twitter feed. Just be cool. This claim is all I have.) Hockey. I worked camera on the 2003 documentary A Day in the Life of the Maple Leafs so I know a thing or two about hockey. Well, exactly two things. One, when I was eight years old, my teenage neighbour convinced me his Mats Naslund rookie card could be mine for the extremely low price of my 1979 O-Pee-Chee Wayne Gurtski rookie card. (Note: I have forgotten how to spell that particular Edmonton Oilers name. At least my night terrors have subsided.) Two, I have developed an algorithm demonstrating the NHL to be the worst run league in the history of Industry. It involves a complicated geometric measurement involving my eyes and common sense. (A fact I will gladly prove over and over again until they, oh I dont know, realign the conferences to have an equal amount of teams. Lets start there.) Fantasy Sports. I Am Legend. In its heyday of 2001, my sprawling website, mikegallay.com, was a sports fantasy powerhouse boasting 16 writers covering all sports, catering to an audience of nearly 16 unique daily readers (and fans of ravines who misspelled mygulley.com). Chances are, if you were a Canadian sports fan in the early 2000s, you were reading articles about topics we also covered on mikegallay.com. The Professor And Mary Ann. I will happily cover all the secondary sports every time a participant either murders someone, is attacked by a spouse using the tools of their own sport, has sex on camera on TMZ, or breaks an important racial, cultural or gender barrier while also keeping our interest for more than eight minutes. Thats my pledge. Am I the precisely correct author to bring you whimsical, satirical, deadly accurate analysis of the sports that matter to you? Absolutely. And can I say that with total sincerity because part of my contract stipulates I have no editor? Two for two. Have I earned your attention to read my column next week? Lets put it this way. My topic will be 23 Ways to Make Over 7K a Week Working Part Time From Your Couch. My third column will be Bardown Seeks New Columnist, No Experience Required. Gallays Poll #1 What would you like to see Gallay write about in his next column? a) A 20,000-word essay conclusively proving Mike is the third Williams sister. b) Doug Gilmours Secret Recipes for 3am Snacks. c) My Weekend In The Hamptons With Barry Bonds. d) No column, just use this space to expand Badminton coverage. Jose Calderon Jersey . Reimer is winless (0-2-1) since returning from a six-week absence due to concussion-like symptoms. The Maple Leafs dropped a 4-2 decision to the hosting Washington Capitals on Friday. Tristan Thompson Jersey . Nowitzki scored 28 points, Harris had a season-high 14 for the second straight game and the Dallas Mavericks beat the Detroit Pistons 116-106 Sunday night. http://www.authenticcavaliersauthority.com/cedi-osman-cavaliers-jersey-c-34/ . The veteran fighter will be squaring off with Henderson in a five-round lightweight bout as part of another network televised card at the United Center on Saturday night. NEW YORK -- It is no accident the New York Rangers are surging just as Henrik Lundqvist is finding his Vezina Trophy form. Daniel Carcillo, Rick Nash and Derick Brassard scored less than 10 minutes in, and Lundqvist made 37 saves as the Rangers routed the Philadelphia Flyers 4-1 on Sunday night. Chris Kreider got his team-leading 12th goal in the second period to help the Rangers win their third straight and fourth in five (4-0-1). Lundqvist has allowed just eight goals in New Yorks past four games. "I got tested early, and you gain confidence when you make a couple of good saves," said Lundqvist, who has given up fewer than three goals in four of his last six starts. "Im happy with the way I am playing. "It definitely helps when we play the way we play in front of me and make good decisions all over the ice." New York, 8-2-1 in its last 11, is tied in points with Washington for second place in the Metropolitan Division -- one ahead of Philadelphia. The Rangers have won seven straight against the Flyers at home, outscoring them 28-8. Ray Emery rebounded after the rough first period and finished with 31 saves for the Flyers, who lost 6-3 on Saturday to Tampa Bay -- ending a 10-game, home-winning streak. Philadelphia had won seven of eight before the weekend sweep. "Its frustrating," Emery said. "Ive got to make some saves, and weve got to come out better. Anytime you put yourself in a hole like that against a team that is playing well like they are, you dont give yourself much of a chance." Lundqvist lost his shutout bid when Mark Streit scored a power-play goal 6:49 into the third. Rangers coach Alain Vigneault offered no theories about how Lundqvist has gotten back on his game after an up-and-down first half.+ "To tell you the truth, I am just focused on one thing with him -- stopping the puck," he said. "How he does it, I dont really care that much." The Flyers were hurt by being short-handed six times in the first two periods. "A lot of guys kill a lot and get a little tired, and the other guys are sitting on the bench and just waiting to get back onto the ice," captain Claude Giroux said. "We need to find a way to stay out of the box." The Rangers came out flying and grabbed a 2-0 lead just 2:42 in on goals 28 seconds apart by Carcillo and Nash. Sloppy play by the Philadelphia defence contributed to both. The first came at 2:14 when Carcillo forced a turnover by Strreit behind the net. Jordan Clarkson Cavaliers Jersey. Carcillo charged out in front and backhanded a shot past Emery for his second of the season and his first in three games with the Rangers since he was acquired from Los Angeles. Before that goal was announced, New York celebrated again when Nash netted his 11th of the season and fourth in four games. Philadelphia defenceman Braydon Coburn lost the puck behind the net to Kreider, who quickly sent a pass out to the charging Nash for a shot from the right circle. New York had a two-goal lead despite recording only four shots. "They were way quicker than us in the first period, had the puck more than us in the first period, and we ended up getting down right away," Flyers coach Craig Berube said. "Weve got to be more ready." Philadelphia got its offence cranked up when Rangers defenceman Dan Girardi was sent off for interference at 6:20. The Flyers had six shots during the advantage but Lundqvist was sharp and turned them all aside. Things didnt go nearly as well for Emery, who replaced an ineffective Steve Mason on Saturday after two periods. He gave up his third goal of the period at 9:24 when Brassard one-timed a shot from the left circle after Mats Zuccarello fed a pass to him from the left corner. Brassard, who has eight goals this season, has scored in consecutive games after going 10 without one. The game turned a bit chippy late in the period, with Philadelphias Scott Hartnell being called for roughing with 1:45 left. Carcillo, formerly of the Flyers, yapped at several players on the Philadelphia bench after he took the seat closest to the partition between the two sides. Carcillo fought Luke Schenn off a faceoff before the midway point of the second period. "I just got here, and from what I can see, when we do the little things right and play the game plan that we want to play against our opponents, we seem to have success," Carcillo said. Emery was much sharper in the second, allowing only Kreiders power-play goal with 6:42 left and stopping 14 other drives. His best save came with 10:13 remaining when he denied Zuccarello on the doorstep. NOTES: Philadelphia had a 17-13 shots edge in the first period. ... Emery stopped all seven shots he faced Saturday. ... The Rangers are 19-2-1 when they score first. ... The Flyers had killed 26 consecutive penalties, dating to Dec. 28 at Edmonton, before Kreiders goal. ... Philadelphia C Vincent Lecavalier earned his 500th NHL assist. Cheap Jerseys Online Wholesale Black NFL Jerseys Youth NFL Jerseys Wholesale Cheap Jerseys Wholesale Wholesale Nike NFL Jerseys Wholesale NFL Jerseys Wholesale Jerseys Free Shipping ' ' '